Sometimes I write lyrics and sometimes I even end up being motivated enough to music for those lyrics and then on rare occasions I manage to turn it all into a song that people can listen to. Most of it is weird stuff and only understood by a niche group of people on the internet and that’s just the way I like it. These days I’m using Mixcraft to create music, along with a couple different MIDI keyboards. I’d like to learn more complex music creation software, but whenever I try I end up just giving up and going back to Mixcraft because it’s so easy to use.
Jenny’s Area Code (867-5309) This is my sequel to the 1980′s hit called 867-5309. All the music and the chorus is obviously stolen from the original song. The lead singer’s wife really is named Lisa, so not only am I stealing his music, but I’m also calling his wife a slut, increasing my asshole points by 37!
What City Please This song is the story of a neurotic man who dials 411 and falls in love with an operator named Kay. Then he spends the rest of his life dialing 411 over and over, hoping to talk to her again. I love how sad and pathetic this song is. It’s based on an old prank call I made around 1994, where I begged a 411 operator to connect me to Kay, insisting that Kay likes me. (Listen to the call here.) Clips from that prank are in this song. Learn more about this song by clicking here.
Play The Game Curtis is a computer hacker you don’t want to mess with. Not only will he infect your computer with a virus that will blow up your home, but he will summon the powers of Satan to aid in his destruction of you. Curtis is a real person who you can learn about by visiting phonelosers.org/curtis/. Learn more about this song by clicking here.
Edgar I started writing this one in 2007 or 2008, but it wasn’t until June 2009 that I finally finished it. This is the first original, non-parody song that I’ve made and also the first song that I created in Mixcraft. The song is based on one of my favorite 80′s movies called Electric Dreams. There is a video for it here or you can learn more about the movie Electric Dreams by visiting Jenn’s fan page. Learn more about this song by clicking here.
Mildred Monday This song was written by me in 1997 and I finally performed it 11 years later on March 15th, 2008 in episode #16 of PLA Radio. It features some classic old-school PLA characters, such as Dino Allsman, Jim Bayless and Mildred Monday. It’s a parody of a 1980′s song called Manic Monday by The Bangles.
linear This song was written by both linear and me, each of us writing most of our own parts of the song. It was written in the early 2000′s, then quickly finished up by me and published in UPL issue #29 in January 2005. I recorded the song in July 2006, playing both the part of linear and RBCP (I sound JUST LIKE linear too!). It was featured in PLA Radio Episode #10 on July 22nd, 2006.
Introduction to HOPE 2008 This song was played at the beginning of the PLA panel at the 2008 Hackers on Planet Earth convention. It was inspired by an idea of Sidepocket from the PLA Forums. It is a parody of Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up, or as most people these days know it, the Rickroll. You can watch the accompanying video here. And you can watch a short video of the PLA Panel, including parts of this video, here.
Boxing This is a parody of The Coloring Song by Petra. I wrote it in the mid 2000′s and finished it up in 2009. The background music mostly came from a MIDI file of the song, but I added in the drums and changed some of the sounds and layouts.
Security Justice Promo A security podcast I listen to called Security Justice mentioned on their show that they needed an introduction song for their podcast. It seemed like it’d be hilarious to record a song not only laced with profanities, but also that bashed the hosts of a “competing” security podcast. This is the result. I wrote/recorded this in July 2009 and then immediately wrote/recorded the similar promo for PaulDotCom below.
PaulDotCom Podcast Promo The PaulDotCom podcast mentioned in an episode that they needed an intro song right around the same time Security Justice did. So I spent an evening in July 2009 recording this song and the Security Justice song, which is listed above. The idea was to start an epic battle between the two security podcasts that would ultimately end in fist fights between all the members during their joint podcast at Defcon. Sadly, that never happened. But you can’t say I didn’t try.
Nate and Di Podcast Promo A podcast that I listened to in 2006 had a contest for making a promo for their show and this was my submission. It was one of their last episodes before they podfaded and my promo was never played on their show. It was a great show and I miss it. In Summer of 2007 they teased us with a new episode, promising to come back, then promptly disappeared again for a couple of years.
SONGS WRITTEN BY ME, BUT PERFORMED BY OTHERS:
Track 01: Guilty Deter This is the first official song ever recorded for the PLA, if you don’t include our old 90′s dance mixes. RBCP wrote the lyrics to this song in January 2005 and included them in UPL issue #29. Shortly after the issue of UPL was released, the old PLA issues.) This song is a parody of Guilty Conscience by Eminem and Dr. Dre.
Track02: What’s The Difference? This song was included in PLA Radio Episode #3, which was released on February 25th, 2006. The episode revolved around all the fun you could have with Deaf Relay Operators. The lyrics were written by RBCP and the song was performed by a deaf relay operator. It’s a parody of the song called What’s The Difference by Dr. Dre.
Track 05: PLA Radio Cactus Intro This song is usually played at the beginning of episodes of PLA Radio and was originally played in the May 14th, 2006 episode. The original song is called Squeeze 1st Jay-Z. The various people saying “Cactus” are professional voice artists that RBCP tricked into sending sample work to him.
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