Author's details

Date registered: January 10, 2007
URL: http://www.phonelosers.org
AIM: bradthecarter
Yahoo! IM: brad_the_carter


I like pie!

Latest posts

  1. Bi-Yearly Update — July 6, 2015
  2. Thunder Tweets — August 1, 2014
  3. Explosive Toilet Drama — April 1, 2014
  4. Answering Machine Hacking — January 14, 2014
  5. In your grandma’s face, like a giant lump of botox — October 8, 2013

Most commented posts

  1. Nigerian Scammer Gets A Laptop From Me — 110 comments
  2. Sacrificial Toasters — 42 comments
  3. Stolen car stereo — 23 comments
  4. OMG Who Framed Roger Rabbit???? — 22 comments
  5. Moral Dilemma — 22 comments

Author's posts listings

Jul 06

Bi-Yearly Update


I got pulled over a couple weeks ago for running a stop sign. On a bike. Yes, on a bike. It was one of those streets that rarely has any cars on it, where I just kind of look both ways and keep going. The cop pulled me over and ran my license. He was …

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Aug 01

Thunder Tweets

Thunder is really rare in Albany. So is lightning. And snow. But I’d say in my 8 years of living in this area, we’ve only had real thunder maybe 3 or 4 times. It’s rare to even hear a rumble off in the distance. It barely exists here. But last night we had a really …

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Apr 01

Explosive Toilet Drama

I’m pretty sure I experienced some horror movie stuff today. I was sitting on the toilet this morning, innocently taking my poo, and I could hear kind of a hissing sound AND THERE WAS A SNAKE and I figured it was the valve in the tank just needing to be jiggled or something. So I …

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Jan 14

Answering Machine Hacking

As far as I know, answering machines in the homes of everyone you knew wasn’t really a thing until the late 80’s. I know they existed long before that, but normal people just didn’t have them. My brother and I would occasionally make prank calls in the early 80’s and I remember how weird it …

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Oct 08

In your grandma’s face, like a giant lump of botox

Remember when I used to write things here? Those were the days. I’ve been up to the normal, boring fun stuff lately. On Sunday I created a music video for Rappy Mcrapperson’s song called Welcome to the Shrubz and he put it on his YouTube channel. It’s made entirely out of clips from the 1990 …

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Oct 07

Somebody is Missing

When I was a kid, it was always exciting to think about “the future” and all the cool advancements we’d have after the year 2000. We were promised many things, like flying cars, robots, teleportation, and fax machines in every room of our house. So where is it all? I know I’m not alone in …

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Sep 24

Harassment Sunday

I got this email notification today from Meetup, under the completely fictitious name of Chris Tomkinson and for local events on the other side of the country. It took a few minutes to remember why I would have something like this set up, but I finally remembered a certain hilarious Sunday in 2005 where I …

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Apr 15

Stupid Technology!

At least once a year I drone on and on rant about some operating system that I hate, so I’m going to get that out of the way right now. Android is a huge, steaming pile of crap! About 6 months ago I upgraded my iPhone to an Android phone – the Samsung Nexus S. …

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Mar 19

Hikes and other equally boring nonsense that you’ll hate reading about so don’t even bother

When I first moved to Oregon in late 2005, I wanted to explore all the woods around here, so I did lots of Geocaching and hiking. There were no hiking groups in the area, so I signed up on meetup.com and set up a hiking group. Within a year, there were over 100 members and …

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Mar 16

Bank Scamster

This relatively new guy at my bank really wants me to cheat the IRS. I’m self-employed and I get checks from different companies, so he starts being nosy and asking what I do. He tells me I definitely need their business account for my business. I tell him I’ve had a business account before and …

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